• Gentle giant? ‘…the corporation is a many-tentacled monster that would be unrecognisable to wireless entrepreneurs of the early 1920s. It has staff numbers that would dwarf many a small city and an annual income of £3.16bn that, if it was a country, would make it a rival of the GDP of Iceland or Mongolia. Plainly the BBC has more global clout than either country. There is no 24-hour rolling news network pumped out from Rekyavik or Ulan Bator. The BBC has more world-class orchestras than either Iceland or Mongolia, and possibly both. Neither has a publicly funded news website that can draw on the journalistic talents of one of the biggest multimedia news-gathering teams in the world. Neither has a film industry that would bear comparison with BBC Films. Neither has Nicky Campbell enjoining people to “join the nation’s conversation” on Radio 5 Live or Anne Robinson debasing that conversation by means of scripted insults on a vile, though extremely popular, game show.’
• Boxing clever: Greg’s debt to John … ‘The air of despair that descended during the dark days of John Birt has been lifted; where once there was discord, Saint Dyke of White City sows harmony. “I remember going to my first meeting of the executive committee and hearing laughter coming out of the door,” cooed the corporation’s new director of television, Jana Bennett, in an interview with the Daily Telegraph last week. “I assumed I was in the wrong place. But when I peeked in, there they all were – and they were actually enjoying themselves.” Over at doom-laden ITV, the only sounds are the scraping of chins dragging along the floor and the occasional splash as another executive jumps ship. At Channel 4 it’s worse: hundreds are waiting to pick up their P45s as Mark Thompson claws back the excesses of recent years.’

‘In many respects he embodies all that is supposed to be politically unacceptable in a modern prime minister. He’s an outrageous toff and an image consultant’s disaster area. What’s more, he has no man-of-the-people credentials at all. Yet, assuming another election defeat, after the disappointment of a decade of William Hague and Iain Duncan Smith, the Tories may well be in the mood for a wild card. The electorate will eventually tire of the joyless puritanism of the Blair-Brown regime. If the Tories want to play the joker, Boris could be their man.’

‘I’m saying, you simpleton, that to claim that the RSPCA is wasting its time complaining about the welfare of animals while people are dying all over the world, when your own life is so utterly and comically meaningless, is hypocrisy. Or, more precisely, stupidity.’

‘Mr Dan, where do you live? If it’s London, I’d love to meet up for a (non-alcoholic) drink. You seem like an interesting fellow.’

‘Ever the fantasist, Barry George may now be adapting to his notoriety (two tabloid newspapers have advertised tapes of prison “confessions”), but he should be a footnote in this story. Apart from that invisible speck of explosives residue found on his coat, the police found no evidence that he had possessed guns or ammunition in the past 15 years. He had neither expertise in weapons, nor the resources to modify them. He had no car, no money. There was no forensic evidence found in his flat: remarkably, police found no explosives residue there, even though it was assumed that he’d gone home to change straight after the shooting. The two squads of officers, 50 in all, who surveilled his movements for more than three weeks before his arrest gleaned no evidence to assist their case. Dando’s neighbours, the only two eyewitnesses, failed to pick out George in an identity parade.’

Adele – “If you want me to be there when you come out will you tell them?”

Alex – “Look, I’ll tell them there is no problem you being there, but don’t just come down for no reason.. just if you want to…”

Adele – “mmmm…” (smooch)

Alex – “… it’s no problem… but I just don’t want you to come down for…”

Adele – “not at all”

Alex – “… no reason”

Alex – (muffled in Adele’s shoulder) “I can’t believe it… I CAN’T”

Adele – “I just… I had a bad feeling… I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know”

Adele – “Do I look fat?”

• Bad Signal: OPi8 Forum — Warren is creating an invitation-only weblog based in a Delphi Forum [wtf?] … ‘if you think blogs are basically just guys talking about how they have no friends, you need to read these. Actual content by people with lives.’
• Amusing Barbelith Thread on the closure of the Warren Ellis Forum … ‘I will not miss the WEF, and I’m sure another haven for the more pretentious sort of fatbeard will emerge in no time.’